Pickle Town

Welcome to Pickle Town.

What you see here are pickle houses.

The laws to abide by in Pickle Town are very simple:

1. Do not hunt, hurt, maim, eat, or otherwise bother pickles in all their forms including cucumbers, tartar sauce and relish.

2. Do not call the Mayor by his nickname, "Mayor Big Buns."

Apparently there was a problem with the citizens of Pickle Town, referring to the Mayor of town by his nickname.  He got very upset and banished himself (okay he ran away).  Then he came back as a farmer.

 Now the town has no Mayor and it is a pretty lawless place.  I hear there are squatters, taking over vacant pickle houses.

I am not sure what will happen to the poor people of Pickle Town, if they will be able to live again in harmony or if the town will become a ghost town full of tumble weeds, or worse a town of pickle eating people.  Some long for the return of Mayor Big Buns, wherever he may be...

I did not make this up.  This was documented and told to me by the inhabitants themselves (otherwise known as my children).

Spooky sleeping during the day, demanding attention at night.

There is definitely some bad juju going down. 

First, the germs hit - staff infection, scarlet fever, viral coughing. I believe we are at the epicenter with mailbox bashing going on at one end of the road and rock wall dismantling and hurling on the other. Then an infected skunk turns up. Hmmm...coincidence?

Monday night, after six weeks of no nocturnal wanderings, my "stay in my bed all night" streak ended. Yup. It's not entirely my fault, the husband was doing things he shouldn't be (besides touching wild skunks) and trying to put me (or my essence) into a canister and send me into space for FIVE YEARS. I was having none of it! I found myself flying out of bed and pacing the hallway. I was so mad.

I went back into my room to yell things like:
"Do you know what you are doing?" No response.
"You can't do this." No response.
"I KNOW what you're doing!!!!"

Still no response, so I stomped away and went to sleep with my twelve year old, who at least has a full-size bed. As I reached his room (after tripping twice over nerf guns and whatnot) he said "what are you doing in here?" I didn't know if *he* was asleep or awake (he talks in his sleep but stays in his bed). I didn't bother trying to explain, just climbed into bed, commandeered some covers, stole a pillow and attempted to get back to sleep.

Unfortunately my plan didn't entirely work as my son and I, and two of his friends were stuffed into canisters and sent into space anyway. Probably by the evil husband. But, the good news is that we didn't have to stay for five years.

The bad news is that he sleeps with our large 18 pound Maine Coon cat who decided to walk on me and wake me up no less than twice during the night to be petted. If that wasn't bad enough, the ducks started quacking loud enough to wake me up at the crack of dawn, wanting to be fed. "How do you sleep in this zoo?" I asked him. I am not sure that I am invited back.

It turns out the husband did get up (not until 5am) to check the youngest bed (nope), the bathroom (nope) and then looked out the window to see if my car was in the driveway (it was). Then he went back to bed, assuming I was at the gym! I might need to get a watch dog. You know, one that can follow me around while I sleepwalk, and then I can let it outside in my fugue state and we can wander around the neighborhood together. Hmmm...

Actually I blame Dr. Who, even though I watched it two nights prior... That show is the reason my six year old will not go anywhere in the house alone (including the bathroom)...

Last night I did manage to stay in my own bed the whole night, except for one trip to the bathroom. Prior to leaving the room, I asked the husband if he would like to come with me. Apparently I am under house arrest and not supposed to go anywhere unsupervised. I think that was also a dream, but maybe not. He didn't respond so I risked it and went alone. And came back.

Very bad, no good, terrible, rotten week...

It has been one of those weeks where if things can go wrong, they will...

The week started with the basement flooding, making getting to the laundry interesting to say the least.  Three days later, it is still flooded.

Then my car started making strange noises.  Airplane loud strange noises.

My fitbit died (if you don't understand why this is so upsetting then you just don't understand...)

My youngest woke up in the middle of the night with a fever.

Then I got stuck in the mud for over an hour trying to leave for work.

I had to pay $500 for a new alternator to stop the strange car noise.

And it is only Wednesday.

Sigh.

Huge thank you to Pat who came to the rescue with his Jeep and tow strap.

STUCK

Pilchy the cat wants no part of this.

The husband tries digging it out...

Pat comes to the rescue with a smile and his Jeep 

I have decided that my  next vehicle will be all wheel drive.  Or better yet 4 wheel drive.  A Jeep.  Or maybe a tractor!!!  Before you ask, yes paving the driveway is "on the list".

What does the tooth fairy do about swallowed teeth?

Friday, February 28th is National Tooth Fairy Day.  I know you are all planning to celebrate.

In honor of the Tooth Fairy, and Tooth Fairy Day, here is another post about teeth.

My youngest has lost two baby teeth.  The teeth apparently were loose.  He told no one.  One day his Mother noticed something funny about his smile.  She said, "Hey, open your mouth again."  Sure enough there was a gap which previously was a tooth.

Mom felt a little guilty for not noticing sooner, or realizing he even *had* a loose tooth.  "Where did the tooth go?" she asked.  The child had no idea.  He said it hurt a little bit in gym class.  He did not notice anything falling out of his mouth.  Perhaps it was swallowed?  Child gave Mom a perplexed look.  There was no mention of the Tooth Fairy...

Then it happened AGAIN.  Same story, loose tooth, quiet child, tooth so loose it falls out on own, unbeknownst to child, unbeknownst to Mom.  Mom notices another gap.  Hmmm...this may be becoming a pattern.

Who swallows their own teeth?  I made child promise to alert me if anything else wiggles.  Oldest child (who is more concerned about the lost cash) suggested he write a note to the Tooth Fairy, explaining about the missing teeth.  So far, no note has appeared, that I am aware of. Apparently I am not aware of all things that go on in the mouths and minds of my children.  The middle child suggested that maybe if he manages to keep the next one that falls out that the Tooth Fairy will make up the lost funds then and that tooth will be worth three!

After doing some "research" online it appears that a good Mother would have helped her child write a note and of course the tooth fairy would come as it is a first tooth (or ahem, second).  Unfortunately too much time has gone by now and any tooth fairy appearance would just be suspicious...

For more tooth fairy drama: Elusive Tooth Fairy

Bed for Rent

I don't know if you experience this at your houses, but my middle child is constantly playing musical beds.  I believe the reason she prefers not to sleep in her own bed is she doesn't want to make it in the morning.

It seems the boys are onto her.  Her older brother will not let her sleep in the bed unless she promises to make it in the morning.  She has reneged on this a few times and so he has refused to reconsider her access.  Now he says she will have to pay him.  So she stuffs herself into the twin lower bunk with her younger brother.  However, her younger brother is also onto her and has also decided to charge her rent.  Daddy suggested six cents per night, but he decided he wants six DOLLARS.

Nighttime is a bit interesting as she tries to negotiate the rental fees.  Just the other day I found this notice...the price is suspiciously the same as the rent...  I like that it has its own web address.

Of course when I broke my toe and asked her to help me out she said "Hey!  I should be getting paid for this!".  Really?  I asked her if she would like to see her bill of what she owed me and she agreed to work for free!

Why she doesn't just make her own bed in the morning is beyond me...or at least sleep on top of the covers or employ any of the tricks we learned as kids to make a less messy bed...  I found this one this morning, so I don't think the negotiations are over yet...

...and I have no idea what membership entails, so I asked Jack and the plot thickens a bit.  He said he made the membership cards.  Her rate is 5 cents a night plus making the bed in the morning or 10 cents a night.  The more she rents she earns points which can be redeemed for something, but he isn't sure what yet.

Interesting...The frightening part is that they have this whole system between themselves and were it not for the notes, I may not even know what was going on.  Right now it's just bed rentals, but as they get older it could be a lot worse.  I hope they keep putting things in writing and leaving them around!  Or, I can do what most parents this day and age do, just log-into their social media accounts and monitor them.

Fortune Cookies...

Last weekend we found ourselves with a free Saturday night...quite a rare event in our busy household.  The boys lost their playoff game (by one goal in overtime) so we were able to skip the rest and head out early.  Everyone was hungry and so we decided to go out to eat.

Relying on GPS to find a restaurant isn't always ideal.  If you aren't looking for a known restaurant, it's always a gamble.  We vetoed a few hole-in-the wall mostly take-out Chinese places in favor of sit-down dining.  We almost ended up at Mezcal, but the wait was too long and it was nearing couple, date-night time so we opted instead for ChopSticks, which was perfect for family dining.  They sat us in the back room near a large birthday party with kids and adults of all ages.

We didn't have to worry about disturbing anyone's dinner, were surrounded by other families and everyone found something they liked to order off the menu.  The food was delivered quickly, two pots of tea were consumed (with lots of sugar) and my son even tried actual sushi and fish eggs!

At the end of meal, they delivered the fortune cookies.  I know most of you have played that silly game of adding "in bed" to the end of your fortunes.  Looking for a more G-rated version, I suggested we add "on the toilet" to the end instead.  My three children love nothing more than potty humor so this resulted in bouts of laughter as we read fortunes such as:

A wise man says nothing...on the toilet

One who loves to sing will always find a song...on the toilet

The fastest and easiest is not always the best way...on the toilet

As we went around and read our altered fortunes, all of us were giggling and being quite silly.  As we left the restaurant I was thinking about how much fun we had, just being together.  Time goes so fast, already my oldest son is as tall as my chin and has the same size feet as me.   Saturday night was a reminder to take the time to unplug, get out of the house, away from the projects, turn off the phones and electronics, and just have fun being together...on the toilet.

MENSA Me...

[caption id="attachment_1007" align="alignleft" width="450"] http://www.mensa.org/[/caption]

My Mother tells me interesting stories that I usually dismiss because they just seem too crazy to not be true...  For example, she recently told my husband and I that after her Mother had her third baby she refused to get out of bed.  Apparently my Grandmother said that her legs wouldn't work and she could not walk.  I believe that she was suffering from a severe case of postpartum depression, but that has no bearing on the tale.

My Grandfather decided to help.  While she was sleeping he took two live electrical wires, crossed them and shocked her feet.  Wait a minute, yes he basically sent an electrical current into his wife's feet on purpose.  Some would call this electrocution.  The husband interjected to ask if these were 220 volt wires.  Deemed irrelevant to the story, my Mother continued that this shocking of my Grandmother awoke her and made her so furious that she jumped out of bed and chased my Grandfather out the room presumably to kill him.  He ran out of the house where he hid until she calmed down, feeling very smug about curing her leg problem.  Yes, she did get out of bed and start taking care of the house and the children again.

So these are the geniuses I am descended from which only makes it more ironic when she starts telling the husband about how intelligent I am and did you know I has a "MENSA level IQ".  Really?  How do you know?  Well apparently she had me IQ tested before starting kindergarten, at the tender age of four.  What exactly does an IQ test for a 4-year-old look like?  Are you a genius if you know your colors?, can read?, ponder the cosmos?  The whole thing seems suspect to me...although I do think I can use this to my advantage during arguments.  How can the husband not concede to my wishes when I am the one with the MENSA level IQ.  I did marry him.  I must be brilliant.

To answer the MENSA question once and for all, I decided to take an online IQ test.  Coincidentally, the normally $18 pre-screening "so you think you are smart enough for to apply to MENSA" test is free during the month of January.  You have one more day to take advantage of this special offer at:  http://joinmensa.org/mhto_form.cfm.

The test is four parts and timed.  You have 8 minutes to complete about 20 questions in each section.  The first section was weird partial pictures of hands and forearms where you identify right or left.  Seriously.  The rest was logic and math questions, which I happen to like.  I took the test amidst distractions and probably would have done better if I focused a little more, but part of me just wanted to prove Mother wrong.  Yes I still have not outgrown my tendencies toward teenage rebellion...and unquenchable curiosity.

These are my results.  I am convinced that I botched the right/left questions...

Congratulations!

You scored a 69 on the Mensa Home Test.

Scores between 63 and 70 from the online test are above the 86th percentile and indicate an approximate IQ range between 116 and 125. This high score indicates a strong possibility that you may qualify for membership in Mensa!

Pretty inconclusive actually.  What the next step requires is paying $40 to take a 30 minute test.  If you score in the top 2% you are eligible for MENSA membership.  Then you get to join and pay dues for the privilege of wearing around an I am Smarter than You pin.  Ok, not really, but I can't help thinking about it that way.  When I was in college working as a waitress I would occasionally have the privilege of waiting on the MENSA meeting.  They were pretty eccentric and did not tip well, despite their grasp of high math.

So I think I am going to leave my little MENSA experiment at that..let's call it a draw...within the realm of possibility but certainly not definite. I still should win all the arguments though!

why I hate my birthday

Happy New Year!!!

My birthday falls on New Years Day and it has got to be the worst birthday ever.



I know I get a Rudolph cartoon character with giant ears to represent me (my ears are fine by the way), but I can't think of a worse day to be born.  In fact when we were thinking about having children I absolutely refused to have one born in December or January.

Here's why...

It starts out bad as a baby...

• Your parents miss a tax write off so right away you start out costing them money.

You get shortchanged as a kid...

• Your birthday falls over school break during the holidays so everyone forgets 


• You will forever be hearing "Here's your Christmas/birthday gift" that is if they remember about your birthday


• Your birthday gift, will always be wrapped in left-over holiday paper or be delivered in gift bags sporting Santa or snowmen.


• You are expected to open your combo Xmas/birthday gifts when you receive them at Christmas so there are no gifts on your actual birthday.


• The timing is terrible, did I mention that it falls one week, seven short days after Christmas?  You wait all year for Christmas and then your birthday and then spend 11 months waiting again...how I envied those summer babies with their every six months of gifts!

Now that I am an adult, and I have outgrown a lot of the present hype (although who doesn't like a present, maybe I am lying a bit) it still hasn't gotten much better.

• You receive all those lovely Yankee swap gifts that people want to get them out of their house and are so excited to have your birthday arrive to relieve them of them


• You start getting all those holiday bills so you are flat broke, waiting for payday and not really in the mood to spend any more moolah on your birthday

This year my sister had the flu so we exchanged gifts on her doorstep - quickly transferring the bags of presents away from the germs.  She said, "The little purple bag is your gift from last year.  I haven't gotten you one this year yet."  I think at that point she should have just pretended...

My Mother however, takes the cake.  Literally.  She asked what I was doing for my birthday this year and I told her that I really didn't have any plans so she said she would come visit me and bring a cake.  I said that sounded great.  She called me that morning while she was baking to ask what kind of frosting I wanted.  We settled on a chocolate cake with whipped cream frosting like she used to make when I was younger.  She was worried about transporting it in her car so she decided she would pick up the cream at the market by my house and we would finish the cake together.

The husband took the boys off on an outing while my daughter and I waited for my Mother.

Well...she arrived late and breathlessly came in the door with an exclamation of "You will never guess what I did."

Uh-oh.  "What, Mom?" I asked, with a sinking feeling.

"I got to the store and realized that I forgot my purse."  Ok, I can work with that.  "Then I went to look for it in the car and I realized I forgot the cake.  I must have left if sitting on my kitchen counter."

Wait, let me repeat that, she forgot her purse and the cake and drove an hour without noticing.

Of course I told her she had to turn around and drive the hour back home and go get it, to which she told me that she didn't have any gas and needed to borrow cash.  I gave her my last $10 plus $ from the kids piggy banks.  Then she left to go to her friend's house for dinner.  Thanks, Mom.

The husband arrived home with a cheesecake to smooth things over.  I think even he pitied me, which says something.

So that was my birthday.  Pretty poignant.  Definitely memorable.  Can't wait for next year.

Ducky takes First Prize

House progress is moving slowly...but we did have some exciting news on the agriculture/animal front...

Ducky our female mallard, won first prize in her division for size and Nibbles won a second prize ribbon for color.  Ducky went on to the next round to win a second first prize ribbon for her class.  My son was thrilled with his prize winning ducks!  My husband won Fair Champion for largest cornstalk.  Yes he did.  My youngest son took a second place ribbon for his lego creation and my daughter scored some cool prizes playing games.  Overall it was a very fun and rewarding weekend at the Sterling Fair.

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Knockers and Lockers

My husband has a theory that when it comes to bathrooms, people are either knockers or lockers.

The knockers do not take anything for granted.  They assume that if a door is closed, someone might be in there.  These are the more considerate people of the world.  They knock, just in case.  Although most of them probably lock, they do not assume that everyone does.  The last thing they want is to walk in on someone.

The lockers assume that everyone else is a locker.  They think that everyone should be a locker.  They are armed with the mission to walk in on people to force them into becoming lockers as well.  If there is someone in there they do not want to talk to them.  They hate when knockers knock and they have to answer them.  Try the door - if it is locked - go away and don't bother me.

Then I think there is a third group - the never-lockers.  They assume that everyone is a knocker.  They never lock a door (you are lucky if they shut it) and become quite indignant if they are walked in on.

I wasn't aware of the locker/knocker/never-locker camps until we put in a new bathroom.  T wants a door that locks.  After pricing the locking, historically accurate locking door hardware (they are called privacy knobs by the way)  I was questioning the need to lock yourself into a bathroom in your own home.  With kids it just leads to the possibility of them locking themselves in.  I was under the crazy impression that if the door was shut most people would knock.

Well, we had our first test of the new bathroom during a family party a few weeks ago.  T's Mother was happy to not have to go upstairs.  Her question after "does the plumbing work" was "does the door lock?".  I said no, but it does shut (and we do have a door)...and then I thought "so that's where he gets it from".

While she was using the bathroom, two of her grandchildren walked in on her!!!  Apparently my nieces and nephews are all lockers.  Now that we have determined that most of my husband's side of the family are lockers,  I guess we do need a lock, otherwise they will be walking in on everyone.

Still, I am thinking of a simple hook and eye or sliding bolt like Amy suggested.  Simple, cheap and should keep the lockers out.

Here is the test:

The next time you are using a bathroom facility that is not inside your own home (rules tend change at home) and the door is shut - what do you do?  If you knock, well yup you are a knocker.  If you try the knob to see if it is locked (if locked you walk away and if not you open and see if anyone yells) you are a locker.  I you never lock a bathroom door no matter where you are, you are a never-locker...

Elusive Tooth Fairy

We have  a big problem in our house with the tooth fairy.  She has been very delinquent in her duties lately.  My 10 year old's tooth fell out in gym.  It was so loose it basically jumped out of his mouth when he caught a ball.  The school nurse put it in a little plastic chest, taped it shut and sent him back to class.  When he arrived home he showed us his tooth and dutifully put it in the tooth fairy pillow.

Then he waited, and waited.  He waited so long he forgot to check each morning to see if she had come yet.  After about a week he said, "Mom, the tooth fairy still hasn't come".  I asked him if he had done anything to make her angry.  He said "I don't think so..."

So where is she and where has she been?  Maybe now that he is 10 he is at the bottom of her list and she is busy the younger kid's teeth...   I asked the kids where they thought she might be, but they had no idea.  We were wondering if she booked a flight on Direct Air and was stuck in Florida (badda-bing).

Finally after nine days, she showed up and left a $5 bill.  I think it was guilt money or perhaps your tooth accrues interest every day it sits and waits for her...

What is up with the tooth fairy anyway?  I can't find a picture of her online and even Wikipedia has little information.  The section on her origins starts with a note that "this section needs expansion".

Just what does she do with all those teeth anyway?  According to the Internet, these are possible scenarios for what the tooth fairy does with teeth:

• collected, neatly labeled and filed away in a museum-like castle


• put in special boxes and used for building things


• ground up to make fairy dust


• boiled until soft and make sugar puffs (???)


• put in spray cans (that thing that rattles, that's a tooth)


• donated to people who are missing teeth


• made into new teeth for babies


• put into the sky and become stars


• planted and grow flowers

I don't know about you, but I will never feel the same about a can of spray paint...

I found a plastic day of the week pill dispenser in the top drawer of my husband's dresser filled not with pills, but baby teeth.  So I think I know what she does with them in my house.  The bigger mystery perhaps is what does HE do with them...

There also is a big discrepancy from one house to the next.  Fairies seem to make up their own rules - the amount of money differs, some only leave coins and silver dollars, some spill glitter everywhere.  My daughter learned on the bus that if you leave a cup of water by your bed she will dunk her wand and the water will change color...

Our theory is that there are many tooth fairies assigned to different families.  We just so happen to have a cheap, forgetful one :-)

This would almost be funny...

if we weren't booked to fly during April vacation.  Ever get the feeling that the Worcester airport is a lost cause - good in theory, but the reality falls short every time...

Worcester Telegram - Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Uncertainty continues over Direct Air flights

AIRLINE SAYS IT MISSED FUEL PAYMENT

Direct Air, the only passenger airline serving Worcester Regional Airport, abruptly canceled all its flights yesterday at the peak of college's spring break, leaving stranded passengers wondering how and when they'll get home. In a brief statement this afternoon, the South Carolina-based airline said "operational matters" forced it to suspend service until May 15.

"We are currently evaluating strategic alternatives for Direct Air," the company wrote. The airline did not specifically say it would resume flying after May 15.

For people who have purchased tickets from Direct Air, the company said: "Passengers holding reservations for Direct Air flights departing between Tuesday, March 13, 2012 and Tuesday, May 15, 2012 are directed to contact their credit card company to arrange for a refund."

The airline apparently ran short on money to pay for fuel. Direct Air's marketing manager Ed Warneck told The Sun News in South Carolina that the airline missed a fuel payment and the fuel supplier cut it off. That left it no choice but to ground its fleet.

...need I say more?  You can click on the link to read the full saga and don't forget to check out the comments.  Lots of happy customers out there.

That's How We Roll

[caption id="attachment_740" align="alignleft" width="150" caption="Snow Chair with Cup Holders and Snow Eggs"][/caption]

Wouldn't you know it, the day I am supposed to leave the airport we get hit with a winter storm.  Not including the freak October nor'easter, I think this is the first significant snowfall this winter.  After the dry, green winter we have had the timing is just perfect.  Perhaps the universe is conspiring against more than just my house...  Hmmm...

Anyway, school was canceled and the husband left early for work.  I called in late and after confirming with a baby sitter so I could get to work, I realized that I had to deal with the driveway.

Our driveway is much longer now and is not paved so you get the added fun of scooping up snow and dirt.  It doesn't melt as quickly either as on black top and forget about bouncing a basketball.

The snow is wet and dense, great for snow forts, bad for shoveling.  Unfortunately small temperamental engines are not my forte either so the snow blower is out, but I know how to wield a shovel.  After about 20 minutes though I started getting tired and sweaty in my work clothes so I called the kids over to help.  This is their idea for "shoveling" the driveway.  What do you know, it worked!

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Our new kitchen...I mean truck

The truck saga...final chapter.

We got the diagnosis on the Dakota and it was not good.  Blown engine I believe is what they called it.  After weighing what it would cost to put in another one vs. what the truck was worth and the fact that we have outgrown it (my knees are on the dashboard when the kids are in the back) we decided to do some truck shopping.

We spent hours on the internet, visited three dealerships, test drove three trucks and stuffed our kids in five different vehicles.  Our criteria were simple:  four doors, 4wd, v6 engine, at least a 5.5 foot bed, sliding back window and as new with as low miles as we could afford.

I would say that I am pretty much a mid-sized truck expert by about now.  I can tell you that the best deal price-wise is a Chevy Colorado.  However, they are small (width and bed length) and have a 5 cylinder inline engine.  Just too squishy for a family of five.  The Tacoma worked, but tended to be pricy.  It also comes standard with at 5.5 foot bed and is hard to find the 6 foot bed.  The Dodge Dakotas are no longer being made and they have rust issues.  The Ford F-150 started making an eco-boost V6 engine in 2011, but they start at $38K new and it is fairly impossible to find a used one.  We didn't quite get to the Nissan Frontier.

As luck would have it, we found a 2011 Tacoma with under 8K miles on it, complete with tow package, 6 foot bed and sliding rear window.  It didn't have the cool back-up camera or temperature/compass reading on the rear view mirror, but we think we can live without that.   Honestly, the automatic windows will be treat enough.

I was hoping for a more muted shade, forest green or navy blue being my first choices.  T said he actually liked that his truck was metallic blue and easy to spot because everyone knew it was him... !!!  Well, no worries there folks because our new truck is Barcelona Red.  I had it confused with Fire Engine Red, but I was wrong.  I think we will still be able to see him coming!

Farewell to the Dodge Dakota?

The bright metallic blue, shiny, can't miss it in a crowd, should be driven by a teenage boy, truck is exhibiting a death rattle.  T is in a state of denial, but admits that when the oil light comes on (and you have oil) and the bomb-like ticking sound begins...it is a very bad sign.

[caption id="attachment_641" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="Shiny metallic blue bomber"][/caption]

I have been researching the price of a new (or slightly used truck) and basically the upshot is... T will be driving around in our new kitchen.  Yup.  They cost an awfully similar amount of money...    Sigh.  Maybe we can put a table in the back and eat it in.

Winter is here

After a surprise late October nor-easter, the weather here in New England has been downright spring like.  It was our first green Christmas in a while (and we mean green, the grass hadn't even turned brown yet).

Alas, on Thursday January 12th we woke to our first snowfall since winter officially began back in December.

School did not get canceled, but the kids ran down, geared up, and went outside to play before the bus came.  They built our first snow duck.  They also came running in to report that the ducks had turned yellow (the snow being whiter than they are)...

[caption id="attachment_592" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Snow Duck "][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_593" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="White (yellow? cream? ecru?) ducks on white snow"][/caption]

The Hoarder Among Us

With the fast approaching holidays, the need to reclaim order around the house is becoming more pressing.  Stuck at home on Friday with a sick kid I decided to try to tame the chaos.  Things were going well, laundry was put away, sheets changed, cobwebs vacuumed off the ceilings until I hit my four-year old's room and faced the drawer.

When you are four, the drawer is a special place to store treasures.  It is a big pull-out drawer under the bunk bed on wheels.  When you are an adult the drawer represents something entirely different.  Mostly I avoid the drawer.  I know it is there and I have a sense of what is in there, but as longs as it is shut it is easy to ignore.  The problem was, it was becoming difficult to close...

So, Mom tackled the drawer, and yes, Mom won.  Here is what I found there:

1. About 50 cardboard toilet paper rolls squirreled away from the bathroom


2. 8 sticks


3. 2 acorns


4. a plastic egg


5. Very large pile of artwork, craft projects and paper with scribbles (aka more art)


6. plastic Sutter Home Chardonnay bottle (?!)


7. Miscellaneous assortment of small toys, silly bands, etc.


8. 1 whoopee cushion


9. 1 yellow plastic Lei


10. 3 feathers

Once I was done and order was again established I realized that when a certain small someone opened the nice, neat drawer there were certain to be repercussions.  I decided a confession was in order under the guise of making more space for Christmas.  Thankfully the purging was met with approval.

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Holidays Under Renovation

Can you believe it is December 1st?  Aside from a freak Nor Easter in October, the weather has been down right balmy by New England standards.  We are lucky too because not only is the front not finished, but the office is all torn apart down to the studs.  I am hoping the insulation fairy will have it buttoned up before the real cold weather begins, but I wouldn't want to rush things...

I have been getting some questions lately along the tune of "how do you live like that"?  So I thought I would provide you with some tips for Enjoying the Holidays while living in a construction zone.

Tip #1 - Take cleaning right off your to-do list.  Chances are as soon as you've got the place spotless someone will decide to saw up something or rip down something and coat everything with dust and sawdust.

Tip #2 - Invest in a blindfold and walk around the house.  After you bump into a few sheets of blueboard, trip over a ripped up floor and knock over some fixtures you will be so grateful to have your eyesight back that you might not notice the mess (for a day or two).

Tip #3 - Stop entertaining.  Better yet, deadbolt the doors and shut the lights out even when you are home.  This will discourage even the pop-in visitors and that way no one will ask any questions.

Tip #4 - Go on vacation.  When you can't have a conversation with your spouse without arguing and your life has become a giant to-do list... it's time to take a break.  Preferably somewhere else!

Tip #5- Ignore #3 and have a big party.  It's a way for you to give back - give guests a parting gift of appreciation for their own homes that they aren't living your life.  Priceless.

Tip #6- Imbibe lots of Spiked Eggnog

Tip #7- Try not to work with power tools while practicing #6.

Tip #8- Focus on those less fortunate (war, famine, disease) and you will realize how insignificant your renovation project is in the big scheme of things.

Tip #9- Always look backwards, never ahead.  Focus on what you have done.  Invite over friends that will say "Wow, you've really done a lot since I've been here!"   Never think about all that is left to finish or how many years lie ahead of you to get there...

Tip #10- Don't stop believing that in the end it will have all been worth it.  Did I mention the eggnog?

Party To Do

I remember when getting ready for a family party entailed decorating, planning the menu, food shopping, cooking and cleaning.  I could enlist the husband to assist, maybe buy a mum for the front steps...

Alas, living in a full-scale renovation (aka war zone) has added a few twists to things.  Here are the top three items from hubby's to-do list...

1. PULEEZE fix the gaping hole in Jack's closet floor.  I can only envision the fun game of "throw the cousin down the hole" that might ensue...


2. Two days before the party the kitchen faucet started squirting water out the side when turned on.  While running the dishwasher (drive portable dishwasher over to sink, attach to faucet and turn water on) I managed to soak the kitchen wall.  I suggested duct tape for its asthetic beauty alone, but hubby wanted to replace the faucet so I bought the cheapest one I could find at Grossman's.  Then went back to buy one with a sprayer (who knew they were a unit) and added replace the kitchen faucet to the "list".  This was a two night job as he put the faucet handle on backwards the first time.  That was an interesting look, but seriously impaired functionality so the next night he reversed it.


3. Insulation, insulation, insulation!  There are full-scale winds blowing through our bedroom wall and we are going to have to resort to stocking caps (or sleeping with our heads under the covers)!  Seriously, I know that the little boards have to be cut and nailed into place to keep that rotten squirrel out and then all the batts have to be cut to size because nothing is the same width...but enough already!

You will be happy to know that item 1 and 2 were completed in time.  Item 3 is still a work in progress.  Oh yeah and a nor'easter dropped about six inches of snow on party day which led to half the family canceling.  You diehards who traveled to and fro in the storm rock!  Jack will never forget his 10th birthday.

The Handy Man...

What life has become....

This is what happens when your life is taken over by a home renovation project...

T is doing a fantastic job "watching" the kids.  If he could only put down that back issue of Family Handyman... 

Good thing it's not a full size pool.  Nobody drown!  And better yet - don't splash him!



Should we be concerned?